In the 1990s, the living standard in China was not very high. Consequently, many people resorted to child-trafficking for income. When I was very young, my father always told me to never accept food from strangers, even if they are acquaintances. I am grateful that my father’s words took root in my heart and mind. And now, let me tell you my story.
It was a hot summer afternoon, so hot that it seemed like it would bake our bodies into jerky. It was so hot that hardly anyone could be found walking on the street. But the heat didn’t keep me from playing with a friend outside my home, even with an empty stomach, because my mother hadn’t come home to make lunch yet.
As we were playing, a man wearing a dirty T-shirt and ripped jeans came toward us. But it wasn’t his clothes that I noticed mostly, but the apples and candies he was carrying in his hands. The man looked around and asked us, “Do you know how to get out of the village? I can’t find the way.” I answered, “Go down toward the riverbank, and you’ll see a road leading out of town.” He pointed to the riverbank and asked “Did you say this path? I was planning to go out in this way, but fierce dogs bit me, and that’s why my clothes are torn. I don’t dare go that way anymore alone. Can you walk with me to the road?” I felt uncomfortable and asked, “Then how did you get into this village?” He didn’t answer but just offered us his bag of big red apples and delicious candies if we would lead him along the path. How tempting it was because we were so hungry.
I really wanted to take the bag and eat everything in it, but I remembered my father’s warnings to never accept food from strangers, even though they might be acquaintances. So, I suppressed my hunger and said, “No, thanks.” But he still badgered us to lead him to the riverbank so that he could go home. He tried for ten minutes to convince us to go with him, but then some adults came, and after a few minutes, he quickly left. My mother arrived shortly thereafter, and these adults told her about the man we had encountered. They said that he was a child-trafficker and they all expressed their gratitude that we did not go with him. Then I understood why he behaved as he did, and that’s when we all started to feel both scared and relieved.
I still get fearful every time I think of this event. Since then, I am very careful and observant when walking alone, and I never speak to strangers even if they try to speak to me. I try to avoid them as much as possible. Sadly, I rarely help others, even though I will give small amounts of change to beggars on the street. But I know that there are times when I should help the weak and less fortunate, but my fears keep urging me to never help strangers, especially when I am alone.
Additional Comments – I totally understand the fear that my former student expressed when it comes to encountering strangers. There are some fears that leave an indelible mark on each one of us. I just completed an internet search for a list of “phobias,” and sure enough, there is a list from A to Z. For example, arachnophobia is the “fear of spiders,” and zoophobia is the “fear of animals.” And every letter from A to Z (except for F, J, Q, R, U, and Y) has several phobias listed, with the total number reaching 98 phobias. I suspect that 2 more will be added before too long.
For some people, fear can immobilize them, causing them to not risk venturing out into the unknown by trying something new and exciting. In my book, The Gift that Changes Everything, I refer to Robert Frost’s poem about the well-traveled and the less-traveled roads. Fear of the unknown causes people to stay on the well-traveled road in an effort to eliminate every element of risk from their lives. And yet, they fail to realize that it is “risk” that brings excitement to life as one ventures into the unknown to potentially discover something new and exciting.
For my former student, remembering what her father told her about strangers was a marvelous demonstration of being a good and responsible child by heeding the advice of her parent(s). In the book of Proverbs, King Solomon wrote, “Hear my son, your father’s instruction, and do not forsake your mother’s teaching; Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head and ornaments about your neck” (Prov. 1:8-9). My student is to be commended for heeding her father’s words.
Sadly, it was the encounter with the “trafficker” that caused fear to invade her life as she realized what might have been had she not been so diligent. I totally understand her fear of encountering and talking to strangers when alone, but unfortunately, her fears may prevent her from helping others who have genuine needs. Because she still helps beggars on the street with some small change, I am convinced that she has a heart of compassion, and I am hoping that she has come to the point of asking some friends to accompany her to places where she can comfort the “weak and less-fortunate” as she noted in her story. Serving others together helps to break down our fears and opens the door for joy to invade our hearts as we reach out and help others.
We should never knowingly put ourselves into threatening and potentially dangerous situations, but at the same time, we cannot allow fear to control us, preventing us from doing the great things that God has for us to do. King David had learned to face his fears of being attacked by enemy troops and he expressed it this way, “The LORD is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? The LORD is the defense of my life, whom shall I dread?” (Ps. 27:1). He went on to write, “Though a host encamp against me, my heart will not fear. Though war arise against me, in spite of this, I shall be confident” (Ps. 27:3).
Each one of us can conquer our fears by placing our trust in the LORD. I suspect that those reading this blog have at least one of the 98 phobias listed by the experts. I know I do, and it’s called ophidiophobia. Indiana Jones and I have something in common — we both “hate snakes!” A few years ago when Peggy and I were in Thailand with ERRChina teachers, many of us attended a “snake show.” After the snake handler managed to avoid many strikes from the King Cobras he was “playing with,” he and another handler picked up a super-large Boa Constrictor and asked anyone from the audience to step forward and allow them to place the snake around his/her neck. Terrified and afraid, I volunteered, and amazingly, I’m still here to tell about it!
If we know that certain phobias are preventing us from effectively serving God, then we need to ask Him to take away our fears. Our part is to trust Him by placing our confidence in Him. He promised to sustain us and help us rise above our fears and accomplish great things for His glory.
